Transformers Mistake

This post is going to be SUPER long because, well, I have haven't posted since...Tuesday? Wednesday?
Truth was I was spending A LOT of time attached to all of my social media accounts and life was getting the better of me. I needed to unplug for a couple days.


You know...one of those weeks. I was also judging myself again this week by other peoples standards, other peoples goals, just...others.
None of those people are me. I really needed to take a step back this week and remember that only God can judge me, right?
Well...everyone judges. Unfortunately I think some people just have it in their DNA but we can still try to rise above it and no one is perfect, but we are our own worst critics!
We spend more time worrying about what others think of us, or still think of us, or thought of us 6 years ago at that party that one time...it's weird being human isn't it?



So, I took a minute away from the computer.

Finding balance in life is hard...does anyone else have a problem with this?

I mean, with my diet I can go extreme, minimize my carbohydrates, up my protein, but then lately I've been having CRAZY cheat days. Saturdays mostly. Especially since I've been able to maintain my weight. I'm allowing myself to bounce around the same 5lbs Within these 5lbs is where I feel my best.

The other night the Mr. and I went out on a date night to go see transformers. I had time after work on Friday to hit the gym & do some training for the upcoming sprint Triathlon that I am doing. At this point I am feeling confident I'll finish. And per my own standards I'll do well. But I really wanted to rock my diet this week. Totally no gluten, soy, or dairy. I think I am always going to struggle with dairy...because well... I like it! But really wanted to skip the gluten and soy because that's what tends to make me feel best or what in theory should work best. Supposedly.
Sitting in the theater after having dinner with a glass of red wine, it hit me how hungry I still was...I couldn't sit through the movie without honestly thinking of the deliciously fried onion rings that were just on the other side of theater. (I have to say onion rings have never been my thing, but boy oh boy are they good at this place, Dudley's).
Obviously there was no time to run over, satisfy my craving and get back to the movie without missing pretty much all of it. So I ran out to the snack bar and ordered a vegetable cup with a side of humus (has anyone noticed how much FREAKIN' snacks cost at a theater???)
After getting half way through my snack I remembered some people put soy in the hummus. (The brand is Sabra by the way)
I was really starting to just get super hard on myself. Like "why didn't you remember that? You were trying to be perfect this week." After eating a few more veggies I reached into my purse for something and also realized "oh duh! I have pumpkin seeds (a great source of protein) and dried cranberries! Idiot, so you spent money on things you shouldn't have bought and you could've just looked in your purse".

Then this scene played out on the big screen.



Cade Yeager: You're not actually leaving, are you?
Optimus Prime: How many more of my kind must be sacrificed, to atone for YOUR mistakes?
Cade Yeager: What do you think being human means? That's what we do. We make mistakes. Sometimes, out of those mistakes come the most amazing things... When I fixed you, it was for a reward. That was it. That was why. The money. And it was me making a mistake. Without it, you wouldn't be here. So even if you got no faith in us, I'm asking you to do what I do. I'm asking you to look at all the junk and see the treasure. You gotta have faith, Prime, in who we can be.
(Image and quote found at IMDB)

Well! There's a wake up call, right? Well! I decided to start thinking about the good things I had done that week. And also remembering that whether I eat soy or dairy, or not, God is going to give me the answers I'm currently seeking whether I eat a 1 brownie...on top of ice cream, or fried onion rings, or whether I'm eating Garlic, Lemon, Pepper Salmon with mixed peppers and broccoli or not.

I keep forgetting the lessons I'm suppose to be learning. Don't worry. Remember I am love & blessed, even through hard times. That I am capable of knowing my boundaries, of realizing when enough is enough. That I can make positive choices for my health.
Because it's not about HOW MUCH I Am eating (although, you do need to eat at least 2,000 calories a day...talk to your doctor or nutritionist for a good goal number designed for you) but about WHAT I am eating. Will it fuel me for a run? Great! Will it make me feel sick? Boo! Every now and then...apparently on Saturdays...it's good to just cut loose.

Especially since I'm not in charge. God is. Some people eat beef, some eat a little...some people think Cows are sacred. None of it matters! There is no need to stress about it...but finding balance is continually something I seem to struggle with this last year...So, I've decided to stop counting carbs/calories for a few days. I am going to eat when I am hungry, balance my carbohydrates with proteins. And pay attention to eating healthy carbohydrates as well. I want to see if I can maintain my  average weight in a few days without logging my food. 

This has been a crazy long post! I also apologize for not getting the paleo pumpkin muffins recipe posted but I will work on that tonight or tomorrow. Blessings everyone.
Thank you for not judging me ;)

Love ya,
A


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