Post Race Blues

I'm SO moody. I'm SO stressed.

I'm not even completely sure why. What I do know is that I felt this same way last time. I cried yesterday. Today, I'm angry. Why? I have no clue. I'm back into training, so there theoretically shouldn't be that big of an endorphin let down.

Ah...I know why, I'm overthinking everything. My diet, my weight, I recently bit off more than I can chew as well, which really has me stressed.
I keep trying to find little things to help me get through these moody moments. I got out for a 45minute run today. Welllll, let's call it more of a walk. Especially when I rounded back to the house to pick up the doggie girl.

She's so slow. LOL

Ugh...anyway...I wish I had more to update you. I got a reminder the other day of some 'bikini photos' I had on my cloud. Two years ago I was so excited about my progress and going into a lifting program I took some 'Before' pictures. Foolishly thinking after a 12 week lifting program I would be one of those fit people with tight abs, great buns, and defined quads.

I didn't entirely complete the program and I've gone on to gain 10 pounds. I've been struggling, it seems, to get back on track for the last two years. I took another series of pictures in the same bikini outfit (Really just a sports bra and under pants) and it looks like my butt got bigger.
I was really beating myself up, but then I wondered...did my butt get bigger, or did my under pants get smaller? It's possible.

I'm suffering from a lack of self confidence this week. PRETTY bad.

I heard these two songs today on the radio. It was probably one of the best things I could have listened to this morning.

Sparrows - Jason Gray

 Giants Fall - Francesca Battiistelli
I also heard this bible verse the night...I cried on my way home. It was a wonderful story, that preceded it. There are so many greats things still ahead. I just need to be still and trust God one day at time.

Alright back to work...