On My Heart: What my depression taught me

Since we've cancelled cable, it's interesting what we've missed in the news. I get all the major headlines delivered to my inbox Monday through Friday from the Skimm. It's a satirical way of looking at the top headlines for the day, but also keeps it real. They offer contests, swag bags, you can become a skimmbassidor...still not terribly sure what that is...but anyway, I disgres. This is mostly how I get my news right now.

I'm not always great at reading EVERY single email throughout the week, but somehow it slipped my attention that Chester Bennington from Linkin Park died. He lost his battle to depression. I'm not sure why this celebrity death, in particular affected me the way it did, but it did. It's caused me to stop and think about depression, about life. The man told me "sounds like a dark rabbit hole that I shouldn't go down."

I think I just want to share with you again, that you're not alone when it comes to this fight, although at times it can feel isolating. That's depressions goal, to close you off from the joy. From the love that actually does surround you.
Some days you'll fight harder than others to just keep your chin above water. Other days you might feel like you're walking on the water.

Lately, I've been having more good days then bad. But I can tell you that it the last year since being put on an anti-depressant I've a learned a few things.
 I've learned that I have to walk away from things that don't serve me. Emotions. People. Jobs.

I've learned to create boundaries.

 I've learned that in order to take care of those around me I have to take care of myself first. Getting adequate sleep. Eating right.

Focus on things that bring me joy. My motto this last year has been Joy. I realized that the devil loses every time I find joy in something.

Fighting every negative thought with an opposite more positive thought.

When the devil says you're unworthy or worthless, tell him you're more precious than rubies.

When he says you're not loved. Tell him who loves you.

 When he says you're not beautiful, tell them there are no flaws in you.

When he says that your not strong enough, that you're a failure
Continue to fight the fight everyday, every hour. I can't tell you how each passing day will be, or how long you will fight this fight. Just promise that you will continue to fight. Promise that when it gets to overwhelming that you will do your best to reach out and find what you need to always keep fighting.



xx said…
Thank you for this. -Sarah G.